Friday, March 14, 2003

True story

It's pt conferences and I'm tired. I've been there for fourteen hours or so and I've sat through numerous meetings with parents whose kid(s) is/are doing fine. They could get a conference with a rock and witness more productivity. And I had the usual run of "My kid is getting a B+ and what are you going to do about it, rookie?" speeches thrown at me as well. Fun and games, all of it.

Then, two parents come in unannounced. Immediately my guard goes up:
Mom: Are you Mr. L?
Me: Yes, hold the applause.
Mom: You teach writing?
Me: In my spare time. But I've always wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer.
Dad: You have our daughter in your class.
Me: Oh God, I'm sorry about that. I tried to reach her, really I did. It's just that I've been under a lot of pressure and I haven't been sleeping too well. If you want your tax dollars refunded back to you, I'll understand, but I'll see what I can do to salvage the rest of the semester and teach her something.
Mom: Actually she loves your class.
Dad: She says it's too short.
Mom: She says she learned how to write.
Dad: She says you taught her.
Mom, Dad: Thank you.
Deep, meaningful pause...
Me: I'll try harder. Really, I will. You think she'd like to SSR?
I'll start taking scholarships in my name any day now. Wait and see...

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